Thank you all and i'm sorry to hear that about your daughter glynntoo. as far as you calling me a smart woman. hehehe. i'm actually a man. sorry to disappoint you.
well, yeah i'm a little scared of the withdrawal. and i need something for now to take care of the cravings. and i can't get arrested for methadone so that's a plus.
so i was talking to my mom today and i was explaining the symptoms of withdrawal to my mom. and she said, if it's legal and it keeps you out of drugs then it's worth it. then i told her about the body aches and she said that at least it would be less then the pain of drug use makes for you and for us. so in a way i kind of don't wanna stop now.
i tried talking to the nurse who gives me the methadone, and she said you have to talk to your counselor and then he'll talk to the doctor. and then in a meeting that happens on tuesdays, they'll decide if i should be lowered or not. and she said i'm not ready to have my dose lowered becuase i'm not stable yet. i'm a non-confrontational person by nature so i just dropped it there. i told her that i don't wanna be on this for months. and then she asked me, why did you come here then? i didn't know exactly how to answer that. i'm just scared that if i try to lower my dose. i'm gonna get this never ending run-around. if that's the case i'll just stop going @ 60mg and go to a detox facility on my 3rd day. maybe i should demand no methadone right? just demand valium, clonidine, immodium and whatever else might help.