Teddy,
I've got to run, but I want to wish you and Kristen well. Relapse, I think, is sometimes a part of finding recovery. I really believe that the obsession to use lasts a short time, if you can get past that, then you're dealing with acceptance. Understanding that you're just going to live each day and not use - no matter how you feel.

In time, you come out the other side, but you've got to stand firm and ask for help. Months 2-12 are in many ways harder than the first two.

give my best to Kristen and let her know I care and it's OK, I know what it's like.

Dave

PS I hope you're feeling better too